Saturday, April 24, 2010

Coming Out and Acceptance Dream

I was in a hotel room with T__, and we were getting ready to go to the swimming pool.  I wore a brown tankini of some sort -- it doesn't really make sense, but it was more like a babydoll in that it flowed from the bra cups, even though it was definitely swimwear.  T__ was not at all shocked or disturbed or even annoyed: if anything, she was indifferent.

I was excited and anxious, because I'd never come out like this before.  It sure was bold of me to come out at a hotel swimming pool!  As we went, I was confused by some spaghetti-strap strings hanging from my bathing suit.  I didn't know what they were for, or where they went, so I asked T__, who dutifully explained that they tie around my legs, and as she proceeded to tie them for me, I noticed that my legs were totally hairless.  It felt erotic to me, but I got the sense that T__ was quite indifferent about it.  Yes, this doesn't correspond at all to any type of clothing I've ever seen or heard of, but it's a dream, what do you expect?  It may have been some type of flimsy and feminine cover-up.

We got to the pool and settled down.  I wasn't shy at all.  I just acted like this was perfectly normal.  People would come by and congratulate me. "Way to go, good for you!" they said.  "Who cares that you like to dress like a girl?  It's great that you can feel comfortable enough about yourself that you can come out in public like this."  I felt silly for having been so secretive about my fetish for so long, and relieved that I could finally be freely feminine in public.

After that, somehow T__ disappeared to meet her friends, and I was to meet them all later at a restaurant.  I went to find her, still wearing my swimsuit, and empowered by the earlier words of encouragement.  I was now at peace with the world as a transvestite, and the world was at peace with me.  I found T__ and her friends, and they behaved as if it were the most normal thing in the world that I'd be wearing feminine beach wear.

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