This is Becoming a Habit

 I'm on another business trip, and as is becoming usual, I bought myself some nail polish and makeup.

I bought a cheap makeup box on Amazon, which includes foundation, bronzer, blush, a bunch of eyeshadow, and lip gloss. It's a very small case, and it comes with little brushes. It's low quality stuff, but I want to practice putting on eyeshadow especially. I had it delivered to the hotel so I wouldn't have to pack it.

When I got here, I also had to get myself some nail polish. I get really excited about painting my nails, and I jump at the chance to do it when I'm travelling alone. I'm getting better at putting it on, but I still need a lot of practice. I still want to wear it in public someday, but I'm not ready for that now.

I also bought some eyeliner and mascara. I couldn't just do eyeshadow, right?

I read and watched tutorials on how to do it. I need a lot of practice. I must say though that it's really, objectively fun! Never mind that I'm a raging sissy, it's really enjoyable putting colors on my face. Brushing it on, blending it, and watching it come together is altogether pleasant. I look hideous, and I did a pretty bad job, but I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Now I've got my eyes and lips made up, and my nails painted, and I'm wearing panties and a nightie. I'm totally girlied out, and I love every bit of it! I really wish right now that I was a pretty woman, so I could do justice to what I'm wearing. For a while I lay back in bed and simply luxuriated in this femininity.

I'll be here for three more nights. I'll be removing the nail polish from my fingers every morning, and putting it on again at night. I plan to practice putting on the makeup every night as well, but whether I'll have the energy to remains to be seen. On Thursday, I'm expecting a delivery of two dresses, a bodysuit, and two bras. I had wanted it to arrive much sooner, but that's the way it goes sometimes.

Right now I'm especially excited that I'm becoming the type of person who knows how to put on makeup.

Working Out

For quite some time now, I've not been getting any exercise. I used to go jogging pretty regularly, and I had a routine of push-ups, crunches, and various other body-only exercises to keep in shape. I stopped, partly because of schedule changes and work and family obligations, partly because of laziness, and, crucially, partly because I didn't want to look so manly. 

Looking back to some years ago, my attitude to exercise has been corrupted by my secret desire for femininity since at least a few years ago. I used to exercise as a way to assert my manhood in the face of these feminine urges, but that stopped a long time ago. At some point, exercise became linked in my head with femininity. I love the way women look in tight athletic wear, and I yearn to join them.

Apparently, I never confessed to this here before, but for a while a few years ago, I had access to showers at work, where you'd have to borrow a key. I used to work out on the beach on the commute into work, and when I got to the office, in the shower, I would dress up in swimsuits. I remember this whenever I work out. Even then, I used to fantasize about working out on the beach wearing girl stuff. I need to write a post about that.

Anyway, By now it's been many months since I've done any kind of regular exercise, and I've got a pot belly, which looks just awful when I dress up. I want to get back into shape, and yes, a huge motivation is how I'll look in the mirror in a bikini or in lingerie.

Some of the few times I've jogged over the last couple of years, I've been possessed with the idea of getting in shape to be feminine. I long to wear women's workout clothes. Remember when I bought myself a sports bra and some workout pants when T__ took a brief trip that one time?

With all of this in mind, I've been strongly considering jogging in feminine workout clothes. I'm shopping online for some cute booty shorts, which I could wear under my male athletic shorts with nobody noticing. I could wear my sports bra under my shirt. This motivates me to work out, because it comes with the reward of going secretly en femme.

Once I have the shorts, I'll have a complete feminine exercise outfit. I'll start with jogging, but I'll be tempted to do my other exercises in it, too. Then the challenge will be concealing all of this from my family.